I’ll Find You…

Posted on August 28, 2023 by DW

This song was released in 2017. Shortly after one of the darkest times in my life after I was struck on my motorcycle by a car driven by a negligent driver. It wasn’t the darkest just because of the near death experience, 15 broken bones, long stay in the hospitals, loss of source of income for nearly 5 months, there were attacks in and on all areas of my life. I called it “The Perfect Storm.”

Since then this song has made me to think deeper, wider, and higher during challenges not just in my life, but in the lives of others that I have met, counseled, advised, coached, or taught. Less than two years later C19 hit, our nation seemed divided, and to me things just didn’t make sense. So I began playing, and sharing this song with others again. Remember, with God, we are never alone. With true non fair weather Christian friends, life can also be easier as we were not designed to be alone. We were designed for relationships, first and foremost with God, and with others.

Life can be tough, very tough, unfair, and simply not make sense. Losing loved ones of all ages, seeing illness, trauma, injury and death takes a toll on the human mind, body, and soul. I get it, I have seen it, I have experienced it, but just hold on, and make it through each day, and make the most of the priceless time. Live in the day, in each moment, be present. Do not take life for granted. Do not take your health for granted. Improve yourself, and your health each day because not only are you worth it, so are your loved ones. There are many things we cannot control. We should learn from the past, not live in it, and look forward. We are in control of what we think, say, do and how we may influence others.

If you are going through a tough chapter in life, remember to keep the faith, and keep turning the pages. If you feel like you are battling what you are experiencing or going through all alone, know to reach out to God, and others whom truly love you. Just hold on, you are not alone. You are fearfully and wonderfully made. Tough times do not last, this too shall come to pass.

Just before my accident on 9/11/2016, I was all set for a long Missions Trip to Nicaragua and to see my sponsored child at the time. In addition, I just finished a series that I led with a group of men from my church called, “Brave”, and I was all set and signed up for college courses for my degree in Psychology-Counseling. The accident wiped all of that out, nearly all of my finances, much of my ministry, much of my physical health, and I had to fight to be in my children’s lives. However, this too passed and I am in great health, physically fit, and went back to college working on finishing that degree in Psychology. I never made it to Nicaragua, but God is not done with me yet. Besides, there is a mission field right in front of me every day, and even online.

Yes, that was a very tough chapter for me. I have had many tough chapters. However, with faith, true friends, and family I just kept turning the pages, proving doctors, and other nay sayers wrong. You can too.

Just fight a little longer my friend
It’s all worth it in the end
But when you got nobody to turn to
Just hold on and I’ll find you
I’ll find you

I dedicate this post to my precious children (aka TayBug, BAM, BooBear), my Queen (aka Bibbers), my true friends, my family, and my Lord and Savior in Jesus Christ. Thank you for allowing me to find you, and you finding me.

Blessings, and Shalom.

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“Motivation and Grit”

Posted on August 1, 2023 by DW

Motivation and Grit

Dr. Deborah Windsor

Industrial and Organizational Psychologist

You don’t have to be a psychology student to be familiar with the terms “motivation” and “grit.” These are common terms that we use all the time. However, a common misconception is that these terms are interchangeable, and they are not. So then, you might ask, what is the difference between the two? I’m glad you asked!

Let’s start with motivation. Motivation is the reason we engage in a task. For example, I do not like making coffee. However, I am motivated to make my coffee in the morning because I know I need the caffeine to help me wake up and get started with my day. As a student, you are motivated to attend class, even when you don’t necessarily want to, because you must do so to achieve a passing grade for the course. By doing this for each required course, you will eventually graduate with your college degree.

Motivation can be divided into two categories: intrinsic and extrinsic. Intrinsic motivation is motivation that comes from within you, while extrinsic motivation comes from the outside. You are intrinsically motivated when you engage in a task because you enjoy it. By performing the task, you are motivated by the positive emotions generated within yourself, such as personal satisfaction, enjoyment, meaningful experience, sense of well-being, and fulfillment. These are some examples of intrinsic motivation:

Taking a long hot shower because it is relaxing

Hiking because you enjoy being out in nature

Cooking because you like the creativity of experimenting with flavor combinations

Taking a challenging course because you find the topic fascinating and want to learn more

Volunteering because it makes you feel good to give to others

Reading a book just for the pleasure of doing so

While intrinsic motivation comes from within, extrinsic motivation is engaging in a task because we want to earn an external reward or prevent a punishment. The task may not be rewarding in and of itself or something we find enjoyable. The rewards can be tangible, such as money, grades, or awards. They can also be intangible such as praise, recognition, and respect. These are some examples of extrinsic motivation:

Playing a sport to earn a scholarship

Working to earn a paycheck

Cooking because you are hungry

Taking a challenging course because you need it to graduate

Working hard so that you will receive recognition from your boss and co-workers

Staying close to the speed limit so that you don’t get a speeding ticket

Motivation, whether intrinsic or extrinsic, can come and go or change in intensity. A great example of this is setting a goal to lose 20 pounds so that you can be healthier and feel better. Your motivation on day one is extremely high. You follow your plan exactly and are very satisfied at the end of the day. You weigh yourself on day seven and are only down one pound even though you stuck to the plan. Your motivation drops somewhat. On day nine, you have a donut that someone brings into the office. Your motivation to eat that sweet confection is greater than your motivation to lose the 20 pounds. However, on day 10, you again feel extremely motivated and decide to refocus on your plan. This continues for a while, but gradually you find that you are less and less motivated to lose weight and soon just decide to maintain. However, springtime rolls around, and you once again are highly motivated to drop 20 pounds so that you will look great in your summer outfits.

On the other hand, grit is deeper in its intensity than motivation. While motivation comes and goes, when we have grit, we are more likely to dig in and do whatever it takes to meet our goals. It is endurance and the ability to get back up time and time again after a setback. Someone with grit will continue until they overcome challenges rather than quit because of them. Grit is identifiable by the passion, perseverance, resilience, and tenacity a person exhibits as they power through challenges and adversity over an extended period of time to reach their goal. Grit is sometimes described as mental toughness as it takes self-discipline to continue pushing forward even when you are not feeling very motivated in doing so, but you must if you are to achieve your objective.

So why should understanding motivation and grit matter to you as a student?

For starters, being motivated will help you work toward your educational goals. Having grit will keep you going when you might otherwise be ready to give up. The great thing about grit is that it can be learned over time. It begins by finding what you are truly passionate about because that will fuel your desire to continue even when challenges pop up. Stay focused on your goals and have a positive attitude because it is easier to bounce back from a stumbling block if you believe in yourself. Don’t be afraid of a challenge. Embrace it as an opportunity to overcome an obstacle, making you stronger and more determined than ever not to give up.

So, why are motivation and grit important to you as a Christian researcher?

As a Christian, I believe that every word of Scripture is truth, and I also believe that everything included in Scripture was intentional in its purpose. Examples of motivation and grit are seen throughout the Bible, which speaks to their importance. For instance, we are all familiar with Noah and how he obeyed God and built the ark even though it took him many years to do so, and while doing so, everyone made fun of him. Noah was motivated to obey God’s directive and had the grit to accomplish the task. Paul was beaten, stoned, and thrown in jail several times, but he continued to spread the Word of God. Paul was motivated to spread the Word of God and had the grit to endure the pain that he went through to do so. Joseph was sold into slavery by his brothers when he was 17 and was thrown into prison for an offense he didn’t commit. Yet, he continued to exhibit integrity and kept his eyes on God. Joseph had the motivation to serve God and the grit to overcome the obstacles put in his path.

Because the concepts of motivation and grit are seen throughout Scripture, I believe this gives weight to their importance. There is a collection of research on both motivation and grit, but much more is needed to understand the concepts fully, especially when it comes to grit. As Christian psychological researchers, this opens up opportunities to explore the real truth and add to the body of research on these important traits of human behavior.

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Higher education, costs, and paper weights

Posted on July 23, 2023 by DW

Knowledge is power, however with out action upon that knowledge, a person just has paper(s) on the wall, and becomes an educated paper weight.

The thing to consider is what is the quality of the education, and professors. Is the education, knowledge, wisdom, and staff credible without biased insertions? In addition, higher education is very expensive. Looking at colleges for my son, and going back to college myself, I was shocked with the costs.

For example, a first year student at OSU or Liberty University is about $390 to $450 a credit hour. Most 4 year degrees are about 120 credits or about $47k to $54k. To even begin practicing in most health degrees requires a Masters Degree. That can be another 2 to 4 years.

Education is important. I believe in higher education, but the costs are a tough stretch when, according the Census Bureau, the average American median income for 2021 income was $70,784, and the average median income for Ohio was $61,938. In addition, the cost of goods, foods, services, and housing has increased with the average rent in Ohio being about $1k. All I am seeing in my area for Ohio is a 2 bedroom homes or apartments going for $1200 to $1400. I shopped at Aldi’s today to stretch groceries for a week for my son and I and still spent $125. Thankfully I do not drive a lot for my job being most of it is remote and from home, but with gas at $3.50 to near $4 a gallon makes it tough on most families. I do not want to get started on utilities, but they are high. Then we have vehicle, home, health, and life insurance. Sigh.

I realize I have shared a post before discussing how it becomes unaffordable to even purchase tickets to watch a top name music concert or sporting event making under $60k with two children. The point I am trying to make with this post is save and invest well the best you can for higher education starting as soon as you can. For your children, get those 529s early. However, in reality for most Americans, it will be nearly impossibly to secure a higher education degree such as a Bachelors Degree or higher without Financial Aid and Student Loans. Not sure why we cannot work it out in America, to make higher education more affordable. If we want a thriving, growing country, we need easier access to higher education with people whom will put that education into action.

In closing, there is a difference between education, knowledge, work ethic, and wisdom. I think most reading this, know the differences and definitions. At least I hope so. A higher education does not always equate to the best jobs and higher income. Although it helps greatly, a person has to work hard, have discipline, diligence, and apply that education, and knowledge. Wisdom is defined by Merriam Webster as
1
a
: ability to discern inner qualities and relationships : insight
b
: good sense : judgment
c
: generally accepted belief
challenges what has become accepted wisdom among many historians—Robert Darnton
d
: accumulated philosophical or scientific learning : knowledge
2
: a wise attitude, belief, or course of action
3
: the teachings of the ancient wise men

The bible also has a lot to say about wisdom, what it is, and what it isn’t, and how it is demonstrated and applied. such as in Proverbs, and James.

For the youth reading this post, or have been able to at least read this long, most of your parents and grandparents are wise from experience. Listen and apply that wisdom. (In which is biblical) Learn to save, invest well, and be good stewards of your money and other resources. (which is biblical) You will be very grateful that you did when you graduate from High School, then College, buy your first house, begin and lead your own family.

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Emotional Dysregulation as It Relates to Technology Use in Children

Posted on July 16, 2023 by DW

Dr. Angela Rathkamp, LCPC, NCC, RPT

Developmental Psychology Researcher

Ideas for research can come from a curiosity, a passion, an interest, or even from our own personal experiences. Imagine this: You are a clinician working with young children and their families. Most of your clients are struggling with similar behaviors that seem to be extreme for the age of the child and out of proportion for the situations in which they occur. You begin to develop a curiosity about the similarities in these children from your personal experience with them. The curiosity develops into an interest and passion for helping these children and their parents who are desperate to find help. You see, that is exactly how a research topic can develop and grow. Without that personal experience, which led to a curiosity and eventually a passion to help, we would not have gained the following knowledge about emotional dysregulation as it relates to technology use in children:

Excessive screen time has been associated with increased behavioral health problems, sleep disturbances, anxiety, depression, and decreased family functioning.

The growth of the ownership and access to digital devices has not only created opportunities but challenges as well for raising young, healthy digital users.

A strong emotional reaction or emotional reactivity to the removal of digital technology may possibly indicate that the young child is developing problematic digital technology usage.

In other words, without research, we would not be able to increase our knowledge of phenomena (an observed situation that happens without cause or explanation) such as emotional dysregulation as it relates to technology use in young children.

Let me explain a little further …

Remember, you are still imagining that you are a clinician with many clients who are presenting with similar symptoms that seem extreme. The parents are desperate for help, and you are curious about a possible common denominator with all these children. After further assessment, you, as the clinician, find out that all the children use technology excessively (or so it seems). As the clinician, you then begin to wonder if there is a correlation between the technology and the extreme behaviors. Now you have the start of what could be a possible research question. You get the idea, right? So, let’s see what happens when this personal experience becomes a curiosity, a passion, and then an actual research study.

First, finding out what research literature says about technology, how young children use the technology, how parents monitor its use, emotional dysregulation in children, and how technology is affecting children’s emotional development was important. Understanding the strong emotional reactions or emotional reactivity to the removal of digital technology, which may possibly indicate the young child is developing problematic digital technology usage, was important to this research as well.

Then, understanding the emotional dysregulation (as it related to technology use) through the lived experiences of the parents, teachers, and professionals seemed to be the best way to gain rich descriptions and personal meanings of exactly what was happening. This is a qualitative (measured by quality rather than quantity) phenomenological approach to research.

By interviewing parents, teachers, and professionals that live and work with these children who are experiencing emotional dysregulation as it relates to their technology use, we could better understand this phenomenon and learned the following:

Emotional responses regarding digital technology usage are different and more emotionally intense.

A subset group of children shows extreme reactions to the removal of digital technology.

Professionals have concerns about what they are experiencing.

There is a need for a set of parental guidelines regarding boundary setting as related to digital technology usage.

There is a lack of tolerance for any uncomfortable feeling or emotion among children ages three to five.

So, why is this even important to you as a psychology student?

Sometimes, the idea of research, as a psychology student, can be overwhelming and intimidating, or maybe for you, the thought of research is actually exciting. Either way, being able to understand that research ideas can grow through your personal interests, passions, and everyday experiences can lessen the overwhelm. Qualitative phenomenological studies can provide great insight and understanding of a phenomenon and add to previous theoretically driven literature.

So, when researching a phenomenon, how does being a Christian researcher change things?

For me, as a Christian researcher, it is important to see the phenomenon though a Biblical lens. A biblical worldview is based on God being our standard of truth. I can trust what His Word says, which sets the foundation for my research. Seeing research through a biblical lens allows me to respond differently, informs my decisions, and allows me to know the ultimate truths.

Dr. Angela Rathkamp, LCPC, NCC, RPT, Development Psychology Researcher

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“I want to be the Christian I want to be.” Let Go and let God.

Posted on July 5, 2023 by DW

Every message I have watched, whether in person, or online, by Pastor David Rudd of The Gathering church in Centerville OH has been encouraging, inspiring as well as convicting. This past Sunday’s message: “From Judgment To Peace: How to Use Your Words to Get Where You Need to Be | 7.2.2023″, aligned quite a bit with some experiences, as well as a recent conversation, prior to this past Sunday. Then, this morning, while listening to inspirational music, & cruising online for a devotional, I came across a couple things that caused me to ponder.

The thing is, being a Christian is not just saying you are. In addition, it’s not that “I want to be the Christian I want to be” either. We can get in our own way. The temptations and distractions of this world certainly can get in our own way and draw us away. I confess I let past trauma, and hurts sour my words, darken my light, and not make my salt all that flavorful at times.

I get it. I know forgiveness, letting go, and letting God is not easy. It is, and has been, tough for me to do that myself. By the way, working with people in ministry for a long time, and facilitating mental health classes, I have heard true life stories of trauma, pain, and betrayal that would make most people’s head spin, and that some may say it is “unforgiveable”. Yet, if Christ, Whom knew no sin, forgave and died for us, then we should be able to forgive others. I am not saying forget, and be foolish to allow yourself to experience that pain again if it may be prevented. Being a Christian doesn’t mean you are door mat to be walked on. I am saying we need to strive to forgive, let go, and escape that prison of unforgiveness, judgement, and bitterness. Bitterness is a root that should not be watered as it will grow and absorb your heart, mind and soul. Besides, forgiveness is more for you than the other(s). It can help set your heart, mind, and soul free to grow, celebrate, and freely love others the way God intended. To be the child that celebrates life and embraces the gift of each new morning.

As I have also learned, unforgiveness, judgement, and bitterness is not just shown with emotions and feelings, but also words, as words can bring about encouragement, inspiration, and positive emulation, or they can discourage, tear down, and emulate negativity and pessimism.

Personally, I am going to try to be better, and do better. You see, there are things we can control, and there are things we cannot control. We cannot control what other people think, say or do; however we can control what we think, say, do, and how we influence others.

I so desire to be a more of a positive influencer. Some one whom encourages, and inspires others, especially my family and friends. However, that it very tough if I am holding onto unforgiveness, bitterness, and pain of the past.

What may you be holding onto that is affecting the way you act or react, in both words and actions? What is holding you back from being the Christian man or woman God wants and intends you to be, not what you want to be?

Let go, and let God.

Make it a great day, because you truly have a choice in making it a great day. While you are at it, may you launch each new day with Purpose, navigate with Principles, and explore with Passion.

~ 24

(If you would like any of the bible verses that support my thoughts and pondering above, please ping me. You may visit and of the messages of The Gathering church online on facebook, or their YouTube channel at this link: https://www.youtube.com/@GatheringDayton)

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It’s that simple…

Posted on June 11, 2023 by DW

Why do we as human beings have a tendency to make religion, faith, the bible, and Christian life so complicated and complex?

The Gospel message is quite simple, and it is not about religion it is about a relationship in which all humans were designed for; with God and others.

God cannot accept sin, and the fall of humanity happened in the Garden of Eden which causes separation from God. A great divide. The wages of sin is death. God so loved humanity they he suffered and died on the cross in Jesus Christ for payment of humanities sin. Jesus is the bridge of the great divide.

This is the gift of eternal life with God by accepting this gift, confessing with your mouth, believing in your heart, repenting, and moving forward to strive to love, lead, teach, serve and live a life as Christ did. To live a life worthy of his horrific crucifixion and death for you.

It is that simple. Really.

Acceptance of Christ, you become an adopted son of the Kingdom of God. You become an apprentice of Jesus Christ. You are a new person through and with Him. You appreciate, enjoy, honor and respect that relationship by gathering with others, learning/worshiping/repenting/serving in church, learning and growing by reading and studying the bible and applying those principles in your life. You share this Good News, the Gospel with others by teaching what Christ taught, striving to live as He did, baptizing others in the name of the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. And you are never alone as He is always with you.

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Looking for ways to save money and pay off debt?

Posted on May 17, 2023 by DW

Looking to save money and pay off debt? Here are some simple lifestyle changes and things you can do. Some may seem like common sense, however, some times we all don’t think as commonly as some.

First of all, I highly recommend David Ramsey and his advice and recommendations. You do not have to attend his Financial Peace University as I did. Most of all he advises and recommends can be found by searching online.

1.) Why buy new? The mark up on clothing, furniture and new vehicles is immense. Buy used. A car two years old is a good value as it has another year or more warranty and you save a ton of money verses buying brand new. Why buy those designer clothes brand new at full retail? Shop at thrift stores, consignment shops, etc… My son, and I, find great deals at Platos Closet, and Goodwill. I also shop on Ebay. Simply wash them well, and you are good to go and will save a lot of money.

2.) Food is typically your second most expensive monthly bill after your mortgage. Buy your groceries and discount food stores such as Aldi’s, and Trader Joe’s. At least buy the grocery brand over the brand name. Most are just as good, and at a lesser price. There is typically nothing wrong with most things generic from food to medicine to clothing. Also when making food, make something that is cost effective that can last for days such a chili, goulash, spaghetti. You can eat these as left overs for another day, or freeze them to eat in the future. If you plan well, and shop wisely, you can get a single person’s food budget down to under a hundred dollars a week. I know, as I have done it.

3.) Utilities is typically your third most expensive monthly bill. Why must you have your home thermostat at such a low temperature during the winter, and such a high temperature in the summer? In the summer, wear shorts, a t-shirt, and open the windows. If you have a basement, it is typically 10 to 20 degrees cooler. In the summer I keep my thermostat at 79, and I simply invest most of my home time in my basement. In the winter, I nearly do similar with the thermostat at around 63 and simply wear sweatpants and a sweat shirt. You will be pleasantly surprised on how much money you will save by doing similar. I have nearly cut my electric bill by 25% to 50%.

4.) Debt is not good, and we all should strive to do our best as not to be in debt. I understand a mortgage may be necessary especially if you get a really good rate of below 4%. However, other debt can destroy your finances if you let it. There is a way to leverage credit cards if you are cautious and disciplined. Opt for a cash back reward card, and pay it off every month. It’s a few extra dollars you can make by simply making normal purchases you already make. I like the new Apple Card, it offers a nice cash back, and it can be deposited in their Savings Account that earns near 5% interest. That is better than any savings account, and some CDs out there.

5.) Couples, split your meals. My Queen and I will often split one meal as most meals at restaurants are rather large. We are almost always content when we split our meals, and we also cut our calories in half with this process. ; )

6.) For goodness and wallet sake, turn off the lights. When leaving a room make it a habit for everyone to turn off the lights. The money leaving lights on, and some unnecessary appliances running can run up a utility bill.

7.) Why are you mailing, and printing so many things? Most of what you may be mailing, like bills, can be done online. I, myself, have rarely written a check unless it is required for school sports or pictures. Almost everything I do is electronic and online. The last time I think I used my printer was back in 2016, except for a meeting I needed paper copies quick for an important meeting. The money you will save in stamps, paper, and time can add up. Besides, did you know it is more secure to pay your bills electronically verses mailing a physical check?

8.) Why are you driving everywhere in a big vehicle, or near any vehicle for that matter? If it is within 5 miles (10k steps) simply walk. If you need to pick up just a few things, bring your back pack. If it seems to be too far or more than 5 miles, what about a motorcycle, or better yet a bicycle? You will save in gas, and become more healthy with the exercise. If you must travel in a vehicle, maybe ride sharing, and/or splitting the cost of gas with others.

9.) Sell, barter or trade what you don’t use, need, or have not used in a year or two. I am trying to get much better at this, and my Queen is exceptional at this. She is a minimalist. I know I have a lot of stuff I can sell that I do not need, or no longer use. My garage is crammed with a bunch of stuff, and I have a lot of clothes I have not worn for years that still have good value. I plan on some serious spring cleaning this spring and summer. Maybe you should consider it too. You may be surprised with the money you can make.

10.) Join a club. No, I am not saying join an expensive country club. However, joining a club such as The Moose, The Eagles, The VFW, etc can save you money on food, drinks, and entertainment. One club we belong too, the food is good, and 20% to 40% less at most restaurants. Plus, there are no taxes charged on the food and beverage purchases to you. In addition, there is free live music entertainment on the weekends. Besides a large percentage of purchases and your membership goes to worth while causes and charities

11.) If you have credit card debt, or temporarily have to leverage credit card debt, make it a goal to pay if off, even if you have to sacrifice a few un-necessities. Go with the lowest balance cards first. It gives you a sense of accomplishment and motivation to get any remaining credit cards paid off. Go with cash back rewards cards (unless you fly frequently) with the lowest interest rates as possible. Take the higher interest rate cards, and move them to another good card that offers a free interest rate for a long period of time, and work to pay off that amount in that time and not charge additional debt on top of it. I have two cards that have a cash back reward that I use to purchase just about everything I need, and even pay bills. I simply strive to pay if off within 30 days so I am not charged any interest, and I earn additional cash. Like I shared above, the Apple Card has a great offer right now. If you open their savings account, you earn nearly 4% interest and your cash reward is also deposited in that savings account. If ever you need that money in that savings account, you can simply transfer it to your own checking account. However, be cautious to make sure you pay off the balance every month as the Apple Card can have high interest rates.

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Better You and Me in 2023

Posted on May 17, 2023 by DW

I have continued, and still going strong, since my New Year’s Resolution of 2020 that I call #GetFitStayFit. I wrote about in a previous article and here is the link:

https://bro24.medium.com/its-not-magic-it-s-diligence-79901c05c324

People have asked me how I am doing with my New Year’s Resolution and what was my New Year’s Resolution for 2023. Well, as shared above, I have continued and going strong, but I have revised, and tweaked my plan. I have also continued having my son, and Queen join me, and call my New Year’s Resolution for 2023, #BetterYouAndMeIn2023.

I have continued on the Mediterranean Diet, for the most part, that I call The Mediterranean Way, but I found I was having too many cheat days, eating too late in the evening, not drinking enough water, not getting enough rest, and hit a plateau in my weight loss. I simply could not get to my goal or ideal weight. Therefore I added back Intermittent Fasting (IF), increased my calorie deficit, and increased my rest on a schedule. As of today, May 17, 2023, I am pleased to say that I have been able to get past that plateau.

Below is my #BetterYouAndMeIn2023 routine and regime if you may be interested in knowing, or trying it out. It does work well, at least for me. It should work for you. However, always check with your medical doctor before starting or changing any exercise program or eating habit.

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Martin’s “Better You And Me In 2023” plan

Below is my son, my Queen and I at the gym on Christmas 2022

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Below is my son, my Queen (photo bombing) and I at The Pro’s Gym in Columbus Ohio at the Arnold Sports Expo in March 2023

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Below is my Queen and I at the gym in April 2023

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Below is my son, my Queen and I on July 4th, 2023

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It wasn’t me, it was Him.

Posted on May 16, 2023 by DW

During C19 and the Pandemic, I created Purpose Principles Passion podcast, youtube channel, articles, and book(s) to be released to encourage, inspire, educate, comfort, and motivate others while helping myself be more accountable. It is the part of my personal mission/purpose statement of “To pour as much love and wisdom into my children as possible, and make a positive impact in the lives of others for the Cause of Christ.”

However, am I always positive, motivated, or claim to have it all together? I am not, and do not. Just like most anyone whom has a few years of life behind them, I have been hurt, betrayed, cheated on, lied to, stolen from, worried, fearful, and endured immense pain, not all being physical. (I still have some pain, almost daily, but some days are better than other days.) There have been times I have suffered from so much immense pain that it didn’t just hurt to breathe, it hurt to simply exist. I have had days, and experiences, that I wanted to throw in the towel. When I have shared more details of my life’s story, I have had others find it difficult to hear, very hard to believe, and wondered how in the world that I pushed forward and moved on.

My answer, it wasn’t me, it was Him. When I had my faith shook to it’s core, near death experiences, immense loss, adversity, set-backs…, it had to be the Holy Spirit whispering, “I am still here“. It had to be true non fair weather Christian friends and family whom never gave up on me, even when I didn’t want to accept it, or hear it. It was the unconditional love I had, and still have, for my children. It was something at the center of my core that had to be re-awakened that is what I now call, and others have called, G.R.I.T. (Guts, Resilience, Initiative, Tenacity)

I strive to be grateful, positive, encouraging, and inspiring. However, some days, my humanity and human emotions cause me to not be as much of those things. This is when I, and we, must recognize that is the tool of the enemy, the adversary, and fear, and doubt are also his tools. We must remember that for every temptation, God has provided a way out, and being ungrateful, negative, fearful, doubtful, and uninspiring are also temptations, traps, and prisons.

If you woke up this morning, be grateful, as there are many whom did not. If you have a roof over your head, running water, and food in the fridge, be grateful as there are many whom do not and you are among the more wealthy than the average of the world. If you have a true non fair weather friend, be grateful, appreciate that friend, continue to nurture that relationship. True non fair weather friends are hard to come by, and they are priceless.

Maybe you are in pain, maybe you lost your job, maybe you are struggling to make rent, maybe you are handicapped, have a disability, or an illness. Maybe you have not found true love…; be thankful, count and leverage what you do have for the good of yourself and others. As my brother had said, “play the hand your dealt, and play it well.“

Below is a bible verse that was shared with me during a very difficult time in my life, and a fellow believer was inspired by it, and said it reminded them of me, and that it may inspire me as I was doing my best to play with the hand I was dealt at the time:

“I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do all this through him who gives me strength.” – Philippines 4:12-20

I share some of my own personal experiences, and testimonials in my writings, and media channels on Purpose Principles Passion, and I also invite others to share theirs. So when I share my real life stories, and people ask me how I made it through, how did I do it? I say, it wasn’t me, I couldn’t have did it on my own, it was by God, and Him working through others whom loved me. Therefore I try to share this type of to encouragement, inspiration, education, knowledge, and motivate others to be the best they can be, and even if it is just a little bit better than the day before. To know they are never alone, and unloved in the world, with God. That a seemingly present darkness, will not last. That tomorrow is a brand new day of fresh opportunities and adventure. That they can be part of something so much bigger than themselves. That they are important miraculous creations, that they matter, and that they can make a positive impact in their own lives and others.

Join me on Purpose Principles Passion, and together let’s learn to, and make a positive impact in our lives, and the lives of others and live our legacy today.

You can easily find my digital content in any search engine. Most have the lion with a 24 watermark, and/or my avatar on a bike. If you cannot find my podcast, youtube channel, articles, blogsite, twitter, simply ping me and I would be delighted to share them with you. Make sure to subscribe, like, comment, and share it. Thank you.

Be grateful, be healthy, be happy.

and run your race with perseverance, and finish well

Hebrews 12:1-3

“Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured from sinners such hostility against himself, so that you may not grow weary or fainthearted.”

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Temper

Posted on May 12, 2023 by DW

Temper

There once was a little boy who had a very bad temper. His father decided to hand him a bag of nails and said that every time the boy lost his temper, he had to hammer a nail into the fence.

On the first day, the boy hammered 37 nails into that fence.

The boy gradually began to control his temper over the next few weeks, and the number of nails he was hammering into the fence slowly decreased.

He discovered it was easier to control his temper than to hammer those nails into the fence.

Finally, the day came when the boy didn’t lose his temper at all. He told his father the news and the father suggested that the boy should now pull out a nail every day he kept his temper under control.

The days passed and the young boy was finally able to tell his father that all the nails were gone. The father took his son by the hand and led him to the fence.

“you have done well, my son, but look at the holes in the fence. The fence will never be the same. When you say things in anger, they leave a scar just like this one. You can put a knife in a man and draw it out. It won’t matter how many times you say I’m sorry, the wound is still there.”

Moral of the story:

Control your anger, and don’t say things to people in the heat of the moment, that you may later regret. Some things in life, you are unable to take back.

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